Who Am I Writing For?

An Essay-Poetry Hybrid

Photo by Product School on Unsplash

How much delusional thought is required
in order to be remembered as an artist?
Will I benefit from some loose screws
leaving holes where ideas can pour out?
Or does it just make it all incoherent,
guaranteeing a reaction vehement?

What is it my readers should thus do?
Chastise all my do-lally conspiracies?
Or tell me that I haven't got enough
and that I'm holding back by not giving
every little ounce of me to 'the fight'?
For only one way's apparently 'right'.

Perhaps, it's all just a reflection
that it's the world - not me - that's mad.
And maybe it's not delusion that I feel;
perhaps just disillusionment instead.
And that's no bad thing, for, you see:
it means, from an illusion, I am now free.

Disillusioned Delusions - A Poem by Tom Shaw

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I’m incredibly humbled to have such a diverse audience here on Substack. Many have come to me through an understanding of increasing global authoritarianism and health tyranny, while others have found me through their appreciation of art and the written word. Some may feel both apply to them. Others, neither.

This does, however, create an interesting challenge when communicating my own ideas through my work - particularly when different ideas of mine will appeal to different parts of my audience, but not necessarily others. At large, societal discourse has become accustomed to having different “sides”, arming themselves with beliefs and ideas, firing them upon anyone who they disagree with. Call it a “culture war”, “fight for freedom”, whatever. Moreover, there’s the expectation that everyone we interact with as an “ally” has to both constantly be fighting, and be in agreement with all the exact same ideas and beliefs on every issue. I see this happen across all circles, whether it be the left or right of the political spectrum (whatever those terms mean anymore), or in communities claiming to stand for freedom and sovereignty irrespective of political beliefs. The moment a perceived “ally” bursts that precious bubble - perhaps by claiming there could not have been a novel virus, or that the genocide of Palestinians in Gaza is unacceptable, or the reverse of either of those - suddenly they are “controlled opposition”, sewing dissent and hindering the “need for unity”.

How ironic then that, in this exact move, an ‘othering’ occurs which, by definition, breaks unity. It implies an assumption that everything we see happening in the world is motivated by evil and that we should just reside ourselves to defeat. This is a ‘black pill’ mentality - and it does not help us to heal.

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The Black Pill
For use in cases of unbearable fear,
increasing loss of control of surroundings,
and the perception of being abandoned.

Directions for use:
Take 1 pill 4-5 times a day together
with any bit of potentially bad news
that you go out of your way to find.
Take a double dose when encountering
news that seems too good to be true.

Side effects may include:
Paranoia, heightened rage,
loss of orientation towards hope,
believing the evil is too powerful
and the best thing to do is just give up.

Store in a cold, decrepit place,
where light and love may never reach. 

The Black Pill - A Poem by Tom Shaw

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Of course, corruption and deception exists. If it doesn’t take the form of some shadowy figure whispering in the ear of the faces of freedom, their becoming ‘compromised’ can be as simple as fearing a loss of livelihood, or by being “taken out” by a global cabal for flying too close to the sun.

But what good does arguing over ‘who to trust’ really achieve?

If it is true that so much of what we’re witnessing in the world is part of some “anti-human” agenda - which I do believe is true - then surely the best thing each and every one of us can do is to be human? What matters most to me is that we can put any differences aside about how we perceive the world and recognise that, at the end of the day, what matters is our ability to cherish and celebrate the humanity within each and every one of us.

This is why you won’t see me talking about the “baddies” or the evil being perpetrated in the world 24/7. Sure, sometimes it warrants discussion and sometimes I have something to say on the matter. But equally, you’ll quite easily find me enjoying the poetry of others on this platform or making silly jokes and puns in response to some of the things that come my way on Notes. And all of that is me being human, celebrating my own divine humanity, and recognising that living a life where external agendas are not putting me in a victim mentality involves treating everyone else as divine human beings too. It’s partly why I was so pleased to see Dr Mike Yeadon and Geoff Buys Cars opening their last interview by talking cars and motorbikes. It didn’t stop them from delving into more sinister topics later on, but it certainly speaks to the idea that living life fully is more than just needing to “fight the evils” that we perceive with some constant fear mentality. We can go on our crusades against evils if we wish, but will there not just be another villain to take on after that one? And if we do succeed in destroying the evil in the world, what will be left in its place? And how do we rebuild and heal from that experience?

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Are you here to wage a battle
or are you here to help me build?
Did you bring your sharpest weapons
or tools to forge and gold to gild?
Did you come to compete with me,
or did you come to collaborate?
For I do not want to fight against you,
instead unite as we head to our fate.

See, there are bigger threats in life
than my character assassinating yours.
Food is poison, medicine is death,
neighbours are strangers and work is chores.
Nature is withered, living is robotic,
the news is lying and the lies are truth.
Right now, all’s the wrong way round.
So what use is giving me a missing tooth?

I’m not here to wage a battle,
I am here to help you build.
I choose to put my axe to wood
and hoe to earth so fields are tilled.
I plant my seeds with ample space
and feed them water, not the blood
of all the foes I wished to slay
who could have been my closest bud.
Then I watch the flowers bloom –
flourish in to being their own.
I make the space I want to inhabit
and somewhere you can say you’ve known.

So are you here to wage a battle,
or are you here to help me build?

Battle or Build?

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You may not resonate fully with absolutely every piece of work I put out. You might disagree or even dislike a particular viewpoint that I communicate through my work. And that is absolutely fine. What you are witnessing is me being human, expressed in an artistic medium. I say it as part of that exploration of how it is we might best be human - and our most divine and authentic human selves, as I explored in discussion with David Cordes.

Authentic Expression with David Cordes

So, who am I writing for? The divine, authentic human being within every one of us.

This Substack is a place for me to hold you wherever you are. I make myself open in letting you know exactly where I am. I write, first and foremost, for myself, and for something I know a version of me - present, past or future - needs to read. I write to the human being that is me, with my loves, my fears, my laughs, my angers, my griefs; all of it. Because I know first-hand that the experience of me feeling those things is real. If I can find value in speaking to that within me, then I know someone somewhere will also find value in it too.

Let me know if you are one of those people in the comments below.

Thank you for taking the time to read this piece. I hope it sparked something in you.

With gratitude,

Tom

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